Obbstackles

So, of course as it often happens, I've been deluged with challenges to my attempt at beginning this blog.  So many things!  Motherhood is always busy, and sleepless...but going back to work and truly hitting the ground running has pretty much swept me away from this website.  All I can say is, I'll try to do better!

T and I are growing and learning so many new things ... about parenthood, yes, but also about each other and about what it means to be married.  My last boyfriend used to sing U2's song "Who's gonna ride your wild horses?" to me fairly often...and I used to think of it as some sort of romantic homage.  (I've always been more than a little naive.)  Anyway, one of the primary obstacles to my writing has been that I'm going through a bit of a necessary growth spurt of my own, becoming a mother and all, and it's being accompanied by those pesky growth pains.  Meaning:  I'm coming face-to-face with my personal issues and some of them aren't too pretty.  But at least I'm facing them.

My pregnancy was rough on T and me, probably mostly due to the fact that I was considered an elderly primigravida and my hormones drove me (almost literally) insane.  I'm still on that roller coaster ride, and more and more I am realizing what an amazing man I have and hold.  I am not the easiest person to live with, even on a good day.  I have a really quick temper when my feelings get hurt, which is often.  Not fun.  But for the first relationship in my life, I believe I can actually get better.  I married the one and only person who can ride my wild horses, and I'm so grateful for him that I usually can't put it into words because I get choked up.  I always knew he would be a great father to my child(ren); he was born to be a stay at home dad.  But what I didn't know was how well he'd be able to love me through all my messiness to a place of healing.  I am full of wonder and gratitude, knowing that my daughter is going to have a father like him.

I could go on and on into the gory details of this particular obstacle to my writing, but I'll suffice to say that Olivia is not the only one growing up around here.

Another challenge has been that work has absolutely blown up since I returned from maternity leave.  I simply cannot believe how busy I am.  It's good in so many ways but in others, it really just isn't.  Some days I get so wrapped up in what I'm doing that I forget to pump, and then I feel horribly guilty and upset with myself, and then I go home and cry about how hard it all is, and that just isn't fun mommy time.   I'm trying to work it out, though, and find a balance.  I find it ironic that I'm a software trainer and yet I just figured out that I can set a twice daily reminder for myself to pump.  Hey!

On an awesome note, though, last week I had to travel to our Houston office to deliver some training there, and since it was an overnighter, I took T and Olivia with me.  It was so great to have them in a hotel room right across the street!  We had a blast.

A final note on the work front:  I submitted my resume on a whim to a company in a very exotic location.  I never expected to hear back from them, but I actually did!  I'm in the process of interviewing and finding out if I can get approved to work in this other oh so beautiful country.  I don't want to say too much about it, just that it's a very exciting opportunity and we really hope everything falls into place.

The last hurdle to my writing has been the age-old malady affecting all new parents:  lack of sleep.  I suppose I'm learning how to deal with it, but some days are definitely better than others.  We keep ourselves going by reminding each other that this stage is temporary (right?  RIGHT!?!?!?) and that we'll get sleep again when she turns 25 or so.

AND NOW...here are a few pics from our really fun Halloween.  It was one of those perfect days...gorgeous fall weather and harmony and love in our relationship. 

Olivia looks so cute in her little lamb costume!  She's so laid back and wonderful, she never even cried when she saw us in our makeup.  She just seems to take everything in stride.